Friday, February 3, 2012

So, Dr. your saying his heart is strong......

Hmmmm….. Where do I start?

Well, you know that as mom’s we pretty much know everything.. Right??

There must have been a manual given to me at some point but I guess I have lost it.

So, I have to rely on my motherly instinct and prayer.

I knew that something was wrong with Bubba…. Like really wrong.

He’s just not been himself; it is heart breaking to see.

He has been spending too many days like this…..
{side note: to any of you that said not to get a dog... that it would be to much work on top of caring for Bubba. You were so wrong.:) This sweet dog has been AMAZING!! He is so in tune with Bubba and is right by his side when he is sick. He is also a HUGE comfort to Regan. Serisoulsy, I can't believe what a blessing a little dog has been to our family.}

We haven’t seen this nearly enough………

Regan notices it as well.

The other day Bubba was happy and smiling and Regan said
“Oh, there’s that old Bubba I love and miss!”

So, I used my mother’s instinct and started taking Bubba into see his doctors.
It was obvious right away by the amount of tests that were ordered, that they were worried just as I was.
We were told some scary things at first....

“we must wait and get the test results back first” the doctor said.
So, that’s just what we have been doing… waiting.
Luckily, I am married to a Knight in Shining armor… remember?

He dropped everything to be by my side for these important appointments.
I love that sweet Knight of mine!

Ok, so now you are asking….  What is going on!?!?!?
Well, there are several things going on with our sweet little Bubba right now.
1st he off he is having tummy issues and will be needing surgery soon to help with the constant vomiting.
2nd Bubba’s levels are off, way off, so he will soon be getting either a broviac main line or a portacath and starting infusion treatments for Bubba every 3 weeks. {After insurance approves it all of course}

3rd Bubba's sweet lungs are having a hard time. Do you want the good news or the bad news first??
Ok, so the good news.... Bubba does NOT have Pulmonary hypertension!!! His heart is doing good!!! Wahoo to that! We have always known that his heart is the biggest and best part of him! :)
So, now the bad... well Bubba is in respiratory distress and will soon be needing the help of a trachea and the help from a ventilator to help him.

We first have to get our Bubba healthy before doing the trachea.
So, he is on a lot of medications and they are running lots of tests so that they can make the best decisions when it comes to our special little hero.

This has been HARD.

Nope, no other way to put it.

There have been lots of tears shed, prayers said, and kisses stolen.

I am nervous as to what our new "normal" will be.


I will figure it out quickly and take care of my sweet baby how ever I need to.

I will continue to love on Regan and answer her questions.

I know that she is worried.

It breaks my heart.

We are hoping that OUR HAPPY and AWAKE Bubba will return after we start this process.

Please keep Bubba in your prayers. Please keep Regan in your prayers.

Thank you all so much for your love and support.

I am blessed with an amazing support system of friends and family.

Yesterday was hard but then I looked around and was reminded how truly blessed I am.....

two sweet friends that rushed to my rescue with out me asking....

my wonderful best friend by my side....

my oh so sweet mother in law that scooped Regan up from school and took care of her for me...

my wonderful mother that is willing to jump on a plane at a moments notice.....

my sweet sisters that know just what to say.....

my loving Heavenly Father that loves and supports me in my hardest moments.

We have no right to ask when sorrow comes, "Why did this happen to me?" unless we ask the same question for every moment of happiness that comes our way. ~Author Unknown

Thank you for your love and support web friends. :)..... and keep those prayers coming.


Anonymous said...

your little bubba and your family are in our prayers. your a strong woman and mother and a true inspiration to many. keep your head up your doing an awesome job.
hugs to every

Kenny said...

I know you hate all of this more than you could hate anything and I am so sorry. I'm looking forward to seeing happy, smiley Bubba again, too! (But for now I'm loving all of you from afar because I am super sick and that's the LAST thing you need right now)

Christine said...

You are the best mother I know (even if I only know you through your blog)! We will be praying for Bubba and for the whole family.

Kevin and Melissa said...

Tears are just flowing right now for you. What a super sweet family you have. You are amazing!

Trisha said...

You are so strong its so impressive to me! I know a thing or two about tracheas and ventilators so give me a buzz if you ever need anything.

Trisha said...

You are so strong its so impressive to me! I know a thing or two about tracheas and ventilators so give me a buzz if you ever need anything.

Karen said...

Still here...praying for your sweet family...all the way from Wisconsin.
God Bless You!

Courtney said...

Prayers to you and your family bound by such love - it shines through in every word and photo. Prayers of comfort to all of you!!

Sarah said...

Julie you are a shining example of what a mother should be!!! You are so blessed and lucky to be bubbas mom and heavenly father knew that he could trust you with him and Reagan and take such good care of them both. I think of you often and wish I lived close so I could help but know that you are prayed for often.

Flyss said...

Your whole family is inspirational, praying for you all x

jneman said...

My prayers are with you and your awesome family.

The Gray Family said...

Julie I am so sorry...know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. Love you!!!

Stephanie said...

Sending prayers your way God bless you and your family!
-Stephanie Freeman

Susan said...

It's obvious that we all love hearing the Bubba and Regan stories, and we've developed a deep affection for your family, so this post was heartbreakingly hard. Hard for you to write and hard for us to read. Know that the prayers are even more heartfelt than before..... if that's even possible. We can only imagine how much daily strength it takes to emotionally deal with Bubba's struggles and Regan's fears for her beloved brother, along with your own fears as parents of this adorable boy. I know, from experience, that when people are praising you for your strength, you don't really feel as strong as they are suggesting you are. But that shouldn't keep you from knowing that your outwardly expressed courage is a positive model for all. Our own personal worlds are changed by the blog journey you've chosen to share with us. All I can say is "thank you". We love your Bubba too.
P.S. Stanley is the best! I can't imagine you without him. Dogs have a special way of lending comfort and it appears that your Stanley knows his job in doing that. I'm so glad you found each other.

Rochelleht said...

Oh, my heart just broke a little bit. I am so sorry that you have to face this, but I'm SO proud of your amazing attitude and faith. There could be no better mother on the planet for sweet Bubba than you. You rock!!!!!

Jonny said...

Continue to keep us all posted on how Bubba and y'all are doing. Know you are in our prayers.

Rachel said...

So now I know how to pray. Even more than before. So thankful that our Heavenly Father knows our hearts, and knows Bubba's heart inside and out. Every part of us.

Never more so than now - is knowing that every breath is a gift from Him.

Thankful that you are making those breaths count.