It's OK, you can say it.....

we are a little Disney "crazy".

Hey, I don't mind what others think of our LOVE for Disneyland.

There are many reason's why we wouldn't ever want to leave good ol' So Cal... doctors, weather, family, beaches, weather, hospitals, weather, and one of the biggest is Disneyland.

I can guarantee that even on a week like this week if we go to Disney we can find Collin's smile. He might be tired and it might be a quick trip with just a few favorites BUT we can ALWAYS find his smile there.

{No Words}

Collin had some bad seizure last night.... is was rough.

Regan would not leave his side.

This morning I let him sleep in while I got Regan ready for school.

When she heard him starting to wake up she ran in.

She held his hand.

She told me how small and cute it was.

She kissed his for head and told him she would miss him while she was at school.

No words can describe how grateful I am for this sweet little girl.

It might be different, but that's ok.....

Yesterday in the doctors office I had "one" of those talks with Regan.

Collin was happy and playing on the table.
Regan was trying to climb on my lap and still the attention away from him.
Then the questions started
"Mommy, will Bubba have to get a shot?"
"Mommy, what are they going to do to him?"
"Why are we ALWAYS having to take Bubba into the doctors?"
With her questions coming fast and furious I tried my hardest to keep up by responding..
"No, he will not need a shot. They are going to listen to his chest, look at his ears and make sure that he is all better."
Then she said
"Mommy I wish they could really make him all better... you know normal like you and me."
My heart sunk.
"Regan, Bubba is very much normal BUT a different kind of normal and that is OK."
Then she looked up at me with those beautiful eyes and said the sweetest thing
"I know Mommy but I wish he could walk and talk.... I wish people could see him how I see him."
"Well, Regan how do you see him?"
Then she said "Mommy all I see is Bubba."
She touched me so much.
When she looks at him all she sees is her brother.
I know that she desperately wants to have him understand her jokes
or chase her around on the playground.
She knows him and understands his wants.
She just wants him to experience EVERYTHING that she enjoys.
That is when I told her that her growing up days {childhood} and Bubba's will be different and that is OK.
It took Mommy a while to understand that and I want you to know that it is OK.
You don't need to feel bad that you can do things that he can't.
He loves watching run, and thinks its funny when you splash him in the bath, and he probably wouldn't even like french fries even if he could eat them.
It is OK.

I worried when I was pregnant with Regan that I would be placing a huge burden on my unborn child. I worried about how different their lives would be.
Often times I still have to remind myself....
It might be different.... and that is OK.

Wahooooo!!!

After a week and a half of Bubba being sick, LOTS of medications, a surprise fever, allergic reaction to one medication, and LOTS of cuddles.....

Bubba is BETTER!!!!! Regan and I took him into the doctor this afternoon and he got the all clear!!!! All of the infections are gone and his chest sounds pretty good! If we stay on track he should be healthy enough for sedation on March 2.

The best part about Bubba feeling better is that......

his SMILE is back!!!!

A HUGE thank you to my wonderful friends that ..... brought us dinner, offered to take Regan, brought over yummy smells to make my house smell better, teach my RS lesson at a VERY last moments notice, come over and take the risk of coming into my home for girls night, and for all of your prayers and support!!!!

HAPPY

On Saturday night I had a break down. OK, my second big break down this week to be exact. It has been a hard week and a half. Collin has been so sick and wants to be held like a baby pretty much all day. Top that off with an average of two hours of sleep each night and I was an emotional and physical mess. I was tired......

So, there I was crying and Jason was trying so hard to comfort me and then he said "Hold on just a minute I need to get something from my car." Then he walked back in with a red bag. He then explained "I wasn't going to give you this but I really think you need some HAPPY right now..... So, happy Valentines Day/ Happy Birthday." I opened to the bag to find my HAPPY. It was the camera that I have been wanting as well as some fun goodies to go with it. My birthday is not until next month and he had only intended on giving me the memory card for Valentines Day but he knew that I needed something to lift my spirits. (And if you know my Hubby you know it would be VERY hard for him to hang onto this for an entire month with out giving it to me... wink!)

I love my new little baby and am having a blast getting to know her.

My LOVE

Sorry there weren't any more "LOVE" updates. This week has been hard. As soon as we thought Collin was getting better he came down with a fever. This has been a HARD week. I could not have gotten through it with out my best friend and my sweet Valentine. Jason had to work CRAZY hours this week and wasn't around as much as we both would have liked but when he was home he was helping and doing what ever he could to help me, to encourage me, and wipe away my tears in my break downs.

Jason is my Valentine for all eternity and that makes me so happy. After ten years of marriage he is the one that I just HAVE to kiss before I go to bed. The one that makes me feel like I can do anything. The one that still checks me out across the room. The one that holds my hand and my heart. He is my best friend.

We met at a singles dance. I drove down with friends and I was more interested in finding a good guy for a friend than for myself. Jason was looking for a girl but not just any girl. Jason, Skippy, and Jason had made a bet. They each picked out who they thought were the most beautiful girls at the dance and then had to get their numbers by the end of the night. Jason picked me. :) He said that I smiled at him but to be honest I don't think I did. He tried to ask me to dance but friends kept beating him to it. So, when he saw me leaving to get something to drink he made his move. He RAN to the room. He made it there just before me and happily poured my drink. We talked for a minute introducing ourselves. "Where are you from?" He asked... "Apple Valley" I told him. Then he came back with a beauty..."Oh, Apple Valley they have so many apples there." before I could even laugh I was pulled away by a friend who wanted to dance. You see Apple Valley is in the middle of the desert.... not an apple in sight. wink! Later that night I did get to dance with him. He told me that he was 24 and I didn't believe him. He didn't look a day over eighteen. I made him take out his drivers licence right there on the dance floor to prove it. Sure enough... wink! By the end of the night he had my number and my heart.

Love Week {day 3 and 4}

This one is going to be a quick one. I don't have much time and I obviously didn't get to it yesterday. woops!!
So, here it goes.....

I LOVE when people send my little valentines, valentines in the mail!!

Thank you Uncle Bubba and Aunt Tammy!!!! Y'all made their day!!!

I LOVE my BIG purses.... Yes, I still need to carry around diapers, wipes, baby food, and toys nine years later BUT I don't need a diaper bag.

I LOVE Valentine crafts and wonderful blogs that give me fun ideas!!!

These wonderful heart crayons made for Regan's classmates out of broken old crayons. Got the idea from Evonne over at the Ballard bunch.

This fun wreath was made out of cupcake paper liners. The best part ... it only cost me $2 to make each of them!!! Got this idea from Tatertots and Jello.

What can I say I love a good ribbon topiary...wink!

Love week {day 2}

I LOVE this wonderful, beautiful, strong and awesome 26 year old!!!! Today is my baby sister's birthday!!!! She is one incredible person!!! I love you~ {oh, and she is single... so if you know any eligible bachelors in Texas... let me know. wink!}

I LOVE her imagination!!

I LOVE toys that still make him happy two months after Christmas.

I LOVE how excited this little girl was to see that her radishes are sprouting.

I LOVE Boudreaux's Butt paste! This has been an essential this week.

Love week {Day 1}

I LOVE <3......
I LOVE this little girl that went to the store with her Daddy to pick up medications for her Bubba and came home with BUBBLES to cheer him up. No, not a thing for herself just for Bubba.

I LOVE that despite being VERY sick and having an awful morning at the doctors office he can still find pleasure in the little things.....BUBBLES.

I LOVE mice when they are soft and cuddly and make her happy.

I LOVE that Regan gets as excited as I do to go on a date with this special guy.....even if it is only to church while Mommy and Bubba stay home. wink!!

I LOVE modern medicine and Collin's doctors.

{unanswered prayers}

"Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers

Remember when you're talkin' to the man upstairs
That just because he may not answer doesn't mean he don't care
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers

Some of God's greatest gifts are all too often unanswered...
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers "
Garth Brooks

The other day I asked you to pray for my baby. Then the day came and I was frustrated that he wasn't even able to have the scan done that he needed. Well, I think that all of our prayers were defiantly answered that day. Maybe at first I didn't understand why this would happen to him.... why he would have to go through so much for nothing. Friday night it was made clear to me why that happened. Collin started coughing and with the episodes he would stop breathing for short periods. Saturday morning I took Collin into the doctors first thing. Collin had bronchitis verging on pneumonia. (with little to no symptoms) She was very concerned and it scared me. So, we gave him a breathing treatment in the office. She prescribed on oral steroid, antibiotic, and we had to get our own machine to continue to give him breathing treatments every four hours. She told me that if he didn't get better that he would end up in the hospital.

Tonight I am grateful for answered prayers that may at first seem like unanswered prayers. I am grateful to the doctor for acting on the feelings that he had on Thursday. For standing his ground and insisting that it would not be a good thing to put Collin under. If it weren't for him following his gut things could have ended very badly that day.

Bubba is still having a hard time BUT we have managed to stay out of the hospital. :)

The power of prayer is an amazing and wonderful thing. We might not always understand the answers to our prayers but God knows each one of us personally and knows our needs. I feel very blessed.