{soccer mom}

This whole learning to "be" again thing pretty much stinks. Not to toot my own horn {toot toot} but I thought I was a pretty good "medical Mama" and now all of sudden I'm not one. I thought I was a pretty good "regular Mama" but boy was I wrong, I have so much to learn, to experience.

Hey, we all do!!!

I am not beating myself up at all..... Seriously y'all... I'm not!

{One of my new mantras is... be patient with yourself Julie... be patient with yourself...}

The reality is that I don't truly know understand the whole "regular Mama" thing yet. I have to change my entire way of thinking. All of a sudden I have been thrown into an entirely new world that consists of after school play dates, lots of you and me time, soccer practices and games, and the availability to do a lot more activities with Regan. Now when our friends ask us over for dinner and fun nights we are available to do these things. It's an entirely different way of thinking. Don't get me wrong... because seriously I don't want y'all thinking that I have been neglecting Regan.... I managed to do some fun things with Regan but our schedule was always so full with dr. apts., strict medication times, and a weak immune system that most of these things just weren't even a possibility.

So, with all of this sudden availability Hubs and I felt it very important to get Regan involved in something. We asked her at least a million times what she wanted to do..." you want to do ballet again, soccer, gymnastics, baseball....." She never would give us an answer and to be honest she is SCARED of doing something new. Hubs and I decided that she needed to be pushed out of her comfort zone and that we would just sign her up for soccer.

Luckily, a girl dropped out at the last minute and there was room on one team. I was so worried about what type of a team it would be. Regan is a competitive girl but I did not want her on "that" team. You know the team where the coach is WAY too serious and the parents are all going crazy. No, I wanted her to be on more of the "butterfly chaser" type of team. Oh, you know what I'm talking about, the team where the coaches are kind and the girls tend to watch the butterflies that go by. Well, I was relieved when I realized that Regan's team was a good combination of booth. There are some girls that are very good and there are those that pick flowers while they are the goalie or even do cart wheels while they are waiting on defense. {Oh, no I am not joking} Her coaches are very sweet and I love the fit.

Regan's first game was last Saturday and she was nervous!!!! It didn't help matters that it was 104 degrees and the game was at 11:30. I know.... seriously, of all days to have her very first game!! She did great but tired quickly. Half way through the game she looked at us and threw her hands up in the air and gave us a look as if to say "what the heck to you sign me up for!!!!!!” When it was her turn for a break she came and sat by me and was on the verge of tears. She told me that she didn't like it and that she was so hot and tired. I reassured her that if she made it through this game that the rest of her games from here on out would be a piece of cake. She rolled her eyes at me but when back in the game when it was her turn.

She stuck it out.

I was so worried after the game that she would come up to us and tell us that she was DONE. I can't even begin tell you in words how grateful I was to look and see her laughing and smiling, really smiling, with her team mates. Those real, genuine smiles are hard to come by and she had one plastered to her face. It brought tears to my eyes as I watched it all play out through my lens. I am so proud to have not one but two amazing children that teach me constantly the important lessons in life, like being patient with yourself and not giving up.

She had a game this Saturday at 2:40. She was dressed and ready for the game by 11. :-)

And yes... I am officially a "soccer mom". ;-)